The Buddha Project Reply To: Self compassion tips?
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Just repeating what I have understood from Gen-La:
Indeed, equanimity is an important practice. When emotions arise, when meditation does not go well, when desire distracts you, to react with equanimity: not reacting with aversion or desire, but seeing what is there without being pulled into a chain of more reactions & thoughts. For me it already helps to see equanimity as ‘one of my key practices’.
Secondly, to see there is no controller (no self as inherently existing self): I don’t want to become angry, but it is clear I am not at all in control. I think this is a nice one, as just thinking this reminds one of emptiness, the non existence of this inherent existing (controlling) self. Turning an ugly experience into some extremely beneficial, as emptiness is the door to liberation & enlightenment.
Thirdly, my body-mind complex is just an incredible complex system of causes, conditions & effects. Apparently, there are still causes & conditions which have the effect of anger to arise. By creating new causes and conditions (e.g. by participating in the IDMT), overtime my anger, other negative emotions will reduce.
Fourthly, seeing that the mind and its emotions is trying to be of benefit to oneself (anger which is trying to keep negative experiences at bay), but that although wanting to benefit, is not working out well because it is not understanding reality as it is (referring again to the 2nd and 3rd point). This helps not be too harsh to oneself.
I realise I have not mentioned the word self-compassion, but hopefully this is of benefit.